8th September, 2021

I received an pleasantly surprising email today. Someone who I wasn’t able to hire for an old post came back looking to see if we might find another way of working together. It was difficult not to hire that person at the time, but something really important brought them back, despite earlier disappointment.

Rather than leaving HR to deliver the ‘Dear John’ or Dear Jane’ regret letters to candidates, I personally emailed each of them with detailed feedback, including this person who later reached out to fin other ways of collaborating. My feedback was sincere, balanced, personalised, and constructive. I say that as of with zero modesty but it certainly hasn’t always been the case that I could deliver such bespoke feedback. It’s another thing I picked up on the intensive MBA-style training course I kicked off my fellowship with. More than receiving feedback, the main thrust of that course was to give as much feedback as possible. From that came the stronger skill to see someone as they are, to have listened and read them as intently as possible. With presence. With care. And to take all of that and say:

I see what you were trying to do here. This part worked, but I’m curious to know if you might consider doing things another way next time.

Feedback can be driven more constructively by curiosity, care, and presence than it can by judgement, superiority, or derision.

How might you improve the quality of your feedback?

If you have a question for Marc, upload an audio recording for it to be featured on a later Q&A episode!